My Self Care Series…
What is Psychological self-care?
For me I think of psychological self-care as learning to love and accept the self, whilst nurturing one’s soul.
As I look at the self-care wheel from my previous self-care post I see many things listed in the psychological section, such as self-reflection, therapy, self-awareness and sensory engagement. When I first started investing in my own self-care practice, I would read these words and instantly feel overwhelmed. I would think and tell myself things like, “therapy? I can’t afford therapy and really I don’t need a therapist”, or, “self-reflection, mmm like I wanna go there?”, and “sensory engagement, what is that, and why would I want to engage my already highly over sensitized brain?” What I was really doing here though was over thinking and overcomplicating a very simple and wonderfully life enriching process, I was also telling myself that I was too broken and did not deserve to take the time to invest in this practice.
Over the many years of being a Peer Support Worker, I have heard similar responses to self-care, for some reason I feel that we like to resist caring for our-selves especially if it is going to address things in such a way that it makes us feel connected to who we really are. If we have been hurt or abused, sometimes the last thing we really want to do is “feel”, after all we have most likely worked very hard to switch those feelings off, so to many, psychological self-care is a step too far into feeling and discovering who we really are, especially if we have been told that who or what we really are is somehow not worthy.
So today I decided hit my second post in my self-care series with what I felt was one the hardest parts of self-care, not everyone feels this way, but I have met many that have struggled with this one more often than not!
So, what does it all really mean and how is it going to help me?
Well, really my answer to this is, it’s only really going help you if YOU WANT it to and it can mean the difference between being stuck and being free, but it takes PRACTICE and much self-forgiveness!
Let me start with one of the items I listed from the self-care wheel above. Therapy!
We often think as therapy as going to see a psychologist, and that’s not wrong at all, in fact it can be invaluable to many if they are working through healing, trauma or other challenges that life brings us, however, therapy is so much more than that.
The Cambridge Dictionary defines Therapy as: “a treatment that helps someone feel better, grow stronger, etc.” It also defines Therapeutic as: “having a healing affect, tending to make someone feel healthier.”
When I look at these definitions I think about the things that have a therapeutic affect on me, such as being in nature, walking, singing, listening to music, taking naps, positive self-talk and affirmations, the list can be endless. I am not a qualified therapist or a psychologist but I am my own personal coach and motivator, and life can throw so many challenges and hurt our way, sometimes we need a qualified therapist to help us get to the point where we can start to love and appreciate ourselves, but we need to continue that work by being our own therapists, by reminding ourselves that we are worthy and that we are enough.
Is it easy? No, not always, but, believe, me when I say that it is SO worth it!
In my next post I will continue to explore “What is psychological self-care?” from a lived experience perspective.
It’s always important to remember to reach out to professionals if you are not feeling well, physically, emotionally and or mentally, my posts will hopefully provide inspiration and insight from the perspective of lived experience and by no means replace the expertise of psychologists and doctors.
Developing a self-care practice takes time and the key part of it for me is to always be kind to yourself.
Collescapes 